30 Songs - Day 19

Day 19 - A Song From Your Favourite Album

No, I haven't forgotten this meme (well, I had a bit), but I have been struggling somewhat with Day 19. My favourite album? My favourite-favourite album? From when, exactly?

I could happily name my favourite album from the 70s...

My favourite album from the 80s...

My favourite album from the 90s...

Even, at a push, my favourite album from the 00s...

But asking me to choose between them for my favourite album of ALL TIME?

No... I can't.

I just... can't.

Oh, go on then.

If I have to...



But I am liable to change my mind tomorrow...

30 Songs - Day 18

Day 18 - A Song You Wish You Heard On The Radio




'Nuff said.

30 Songs - Day 17

Day 17 - A Song You Hear Often On The Radio

I don't listen to the radio much. Apart from Mark Radcliffe. And Alex Lester when I can't sleep. Some of you will know why, but it's not something I can discuss here. For the time being.

Many people are critical of local radio stations that only seem to have three songs on their playlist at any one time. One of those three, at the moment, would appear to be this relatively harmless little ditty...



I don't dislike Katy Perry. Every generation needs a decent out-and-out popstar, and she's far less annoying than Lady Gaga. She's sexy in a very obvious and plastic way and does appear to work hard doing what she does. Snoop Dogg is also someone I have a lot of time for. He was great in Monk.

The only problem I have with Katy Perry is her choice in men. There hasn't yet been a deep enough hole dug to cast Russell Brand into for all eternity... but my spade continues to dig.

That said, I still prefer the Beach Boys version.

30 Songs - Day 16

Day 16 - A Song You Used To Love But Now Hate

Ah, the Beatles. You've got to love 'em, haven't you?

As mentioned previously, despite being a huge Lennon & McCartney fan in my youth, I burnt out on the Fab Four some years ago. It's the sheer damn ubiquity of them that gets me. And while there are still many Beatles songs I can hear without having to rush over and turn off the radio (generally post-Sgt. Pepper), there are some that send me into a Macca-stomping rage. Hello, Goodbye is the worst offender... though I can't explain why. It has that irritating singsong quality of McCartney at his chirpy-chappiest.

The curious thing is, I don't hold the same animosity towards Wings or solo McCartney. I can do without seeing his perma-grinned face gurning out of the TV at me, but I'd still sing along at the top of my voice to Jet, like Alan Partridge in his hotel room. But as Alan himself always says - "Wings - they're the band the Beatles could have been."

Erm...

30 Songs - Day 15

Can't believe I've been doing this meme since April and I've only just reached the halfway point! In case you missed any of the previous days (how could you live with yourself?)...

Day 1 - My Favourite Song

Day 2 - My Least Favourite Song

Day 3 - A Song That Makes Me Happy

Day 4 - A Song That Makes Me Sad

Day 5 - A Song That Reminds Me Of Someone

Day 6 - A Song That Reminds Me Of Somewhere

Day 7 - A Song That Reminds Me Of A Certain Event

Day 8 - A Song I Know All The Words To

Day 9 - A Song I Can Dance To

Day 10 - A Song That Makes Me Fall Asleep

Day 11 - A Song From My Favourite Band

Day 12 - A Song From A Band I Hate

Day 13 - a Song That's A Guilty Pleasure

Day 14 - A Song No One Would Expect Me To Love

All of which brings me to...


Day 15 - A Song That Describes You


Oh, the endless possibilities! Do I go for Theaudience's A Pessimist Is Never Disappointed (Sophie Ellis-Bextor when she was cool...er - she'll always be cool, even as a pop kid.)

Or how about Lloyd Cole's woeful Mr. Malcontent?

Starsailor's Poor, Misguided Fool?

Or Justin Currie's ode to misanthropy No, Surrender? (That comma is essential.)


No, let's try and be positive about myself for a change, eh? Just to surprise you all...

30 Songs - Day 14

Day 14 - A Song No One Would Expect You To Love

As with the previous day's quest for my Guilty Pleasure song, I struggled to think of a song no one would expect me to love. Then I remembered a tune that's been kicking around in my head all week from Dan Le Sac and Scroobius Pip...



The duo first came to my notice with their hilarious and biting list-song Thou Shalt Always Kill, but though that track had its roots in rap and drum 'n' bass, its heart was all indie kid - hence its crossover success. Many of the other tracks on DLS Vs SP's debut album performed a similar balancing act, particularly Letter From God and Angles. However, the reviews suggested their follow-up record towed a much more dance-oriented line, so I had my doubts whether it'd appeal. But though there's nothing quite as strong as the three tracks mentioned above, there's much fun to be had with the rhymes and themes developed by natural storyteller Pip (plus he's got a great beard). I'll never be a fan of electronic beeps - I'd always prefer a guitar or piano ("proper instruments," says the fogey inside me) - but if the lyrics are good enough, I'll keep coming back for more.

30 Songs - Day 13

Day 13 - A Song That's A Guilty Pleasure

I'm not sure I subscribe to the whole Guilty Pleasures bandwagon. After all, I'm someone who proudly boasts a record collection that includes Barry Manilow, Dean Friedman, Bon Jovi, Pink, Hall & Oates, Bryan Adams, Andrew Gold, ELO and many other MOR crimes against cool. And I'm not ashamed of any of them. I will stand up with pride and admit that the first 7" single I bought was Respect Yourself by Bruce Willis. I consider Kevin Rowland's much-maligned covers set My Beauty a work of genius (though the cover, with Kev in stocking and suspenders was a bad idea - even after my stockings confession last week!). I will happily admit to at one time or another having bought records by Whitney Houston, Robbie Williams, Mike & The Mechanics, Hootie & The Blowfish, Kula Shaker and even Phil Collins. No shame, no guilt. (Though I'm not saying I've listened to any of them in the last 10-15 years... or that I still own them.)

So... a record I actually feel guilty about liking?



The difference between all the artists above and Scouting For Girls is that, love them or hate them, Hall & Oates, Bon Jovi, Dean Friedman et al. have a degree of musical talent. The music they make might not be cool or to your liking, but they have songwriting, singing and instrument-playing talent.

Scouting For Girls, on the other hand, write jingles. This is an enormous talent in and of itself, but I'm damned if I believe there's any artistic merit to it. They write songs that are instantly, insanely catchy yet have as much depth as the We Buy Any Car advert or the Intel Inside bing-bong-bing. The first time I heard This Ain't A Love Song (even the title is unoriginal), I felt like I'd heard it a hundred times before. By the time I'd heard it three times, I was sick of it. If I ever hear it again, you'll find me sitting in a high window with a higher powered rifle taking potshots at passers by. I am seriously ashamed that I ever liked anything by Scouting For Girls, even for a split second. That is a guilty "pleasure".

30 Songs - Day 12

Day 12 - A Song From A Band You Hate

And no prizes for guessing who that band will be.

Oh, how do I hate U2... let me count the ways. What's worse? Their world-conquering bombast? Their self-righteous pomposity? Their smug, humourless egotism? That blasphemous Spidey musical? (Oh, the horror.) Or just the fact that Bono is such a cock?

As with many awful bands though - or at least many awful bands who have been around at least half as long as U2 - I don't hate their music quite as much as I hate them. Yes, I'll turn off the radio if I hear the opening bars of With Or Without You or Where The Streets Have No Name, but it's more for the image they bring with them - Bono's big gurning mug, those stupid red sunglasses, the stubble... and that voice. That voice that makes Bob Geldof sound like Julie Andrews. Not the singing voice: the patronising, proselytising, "I'm bigger than Jesus", Here-I-Am-At-The-UN-with-my-mate-the-new-Nazi-Pope-bow-down-before-me-you-ignorant-serfs speaking voice.

That said, if I close my eyes and try to expunge all thoughts of His Holy Smugalot from my mind... I don't abhor every single U2 song. New Year's Day, Desire, One (especially the Johnny Cash version), The Sweetest Thing, Beautiful Day... I wouldn't want them in my mp3 library, but I wouldn't tear off my ears and pour battery acid in the holes to stop me from ever hearing them again.

The track below is as close as I ever came to actually buying a U2 record. Even at the tender age of 16, common sense prevailed, but I've got to at least give them this...

30 Songs - Day 11

Day 11 - A Song From Your Favourite Band

Ah, but my favourite band when?

This week?

This year?

This millennium?

...of the 90s?

...of the 80s?

...of the 70s?

...of the 60s?

...of the 50s?

Or... of all time?

30 Songs - Day 10

Day 10 - A Song That Makes You Fall Asleep



Back in my early 20s, I went through the worst bout of insomnia I've ever suffered. I was working nights at the time, getting home at about 3am, then catching maybe a couple of hours sleep (if I was lucky) before dawn jolted me awake. This went on night after night for weeks on end. I went to the doctors, I chewed sleeping tablets like Opal Fruits, I did strange relaxation exercises involving lots of ommmmmms... nothing had any effect.

Then one night I put on Hats by the Blue Nile. It was, and probably still is, the most chilled-out record in my collection. I defy you to put this record on late at night and try to stay awake beyond this... the first...

ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

30 Songs - Day 9

Day 09 - A Song You Can Dance To

As has been made abundantly clear, I'm not the biggest fan of dance music. I primarily appreciate music in my head and my heart, rather than my feet. Of course, that's not to say I don't feel an itching in my toes at the sound of a well-curated indie disco, or even a soulful chunk of floorfilling Northern or wedding party Dexys. The last time I properly crashed the dancefloor though, it was to get down to This Charming Man and Born To Run, hardly your first thought when it comes to songs that put a beat in your feet.

"I'm a lover, not a dancer," as Jim Steinman put it - and I did almost choose his gloriously overblown Dance In My Pants for Day 9... but then I took a moment to think back to the school discos of my youth. Whenever I do that, two artists stick in my mind. The first is Whitney Houston, whose smiling, wailing, triumphant I Wanna Dance With Somebody almost made a pop-kid of me. The second, much less surprising, is the Housemartins. Yes, I well remember watching everyone slow dance to Caravan Of Love, but I was generally hugging the wall by the time that came on. You'd be far more likely to catch me on my toes to this, a happy hour or so earlier in the night...

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30 Songs - Day 8

Day 08 - A Song You Know All The Words To

A sad fact widely known
The most impassionate song
To a lonely soul
Is so easily outgrown
But don't forget the songs
That made you smile
And the songs that made you cry
When you lay in awe
On the bedroom floor
And said : "Oh, oh, smother me Mother..."

So sang Morrissey in his tribute to those long teenage hours spent studying lyrics. How many hours did I spend on my bedroom floor, lyrics sheet in hand - or, on those frustrating occasions when no lyrics sheet was provided, headphones on, writing them out myself, listening to that one line over and over again to work out... just what were they singing? Kids these days don't know how lucky they've got it, in a world where most songs give up their mystery at the click of a mouse. I'm glad I grew up when I did.



One of the songs I spent longest on as a teenager was Don McLean's American Pie. Ostensibly a song about the death of Buddy Holly, whole theses have been written about the many supposed references that pepper the song's 8.33 running time. Was Bob Dylan the Jester? Elvis the king? Was it Lennon or Lenin who read a book on Marx? Was that a reference to Altamont? Is Mick Jagger satan? Or are some people reading far too much into it?

When asked what American Pie really meant, Don McLean quipped, "it means I never have to work again". Seems like a pretty good deal to me. Being that he also gave us Vincent and Castles In The Air, his retirement is well-deserved.

30 Songs - Day 7

Day 07 - A Song That Reminds You Of A Certain Event

I haven't forgotten this ongoing musical meme, honestly. Sometimes there just aren't enough blogging days in the week.



I wasn't looking forward to Sunday the 31st of August, 1997. Back then I was working in radio promotions and had been tasked with organising a huge Party In The Park event with loads of shitty pre-X-Factor style boy and girl bands and a humongous crowd of listeners. Worse still, my manager had gone off on holiday and pretty much left me to it. I'd been dreading the event for weeks - so much could go wrong, and it'd all be on my head.

And then, in the early hours of the big day, a Mercedes S-280 crashed in the Pont de l'Alma tunnel in Paris and our event - and along with hundreds more all across the world - was cancelled. Much has been written about the ridiculous levels of public mourning following the death of Princess Diana, but while I bore the woman no ill will, I couldn't help but breath a huge sigh of relief at her timing.

Your Lucky Day In Hell was the third single from the Eels' debut album and many expected it to follow the previous two into the higher reaches of the chart. Unfortunately, it was released the day after Di's death, by which time it had been withdrawn from every playlist in the country as radio stations went into mass panic mode and started playing Elton John 24/7.

Go on, tell me you'd rather hear Candle In The Wind '97...

30 Songs - Day 6

Day 06 - A Song That Reminds You Of Somewhere



The first time I flew the nest I was in my early 20s. I'd just come out of an ill-advised and emotionally scarring relationship and I thought what I needed most to sort my life out was a place of my own. Unfortunately, the only place I could afford was a shitty one-down two-up hovel perched precariously over the motorway with pleasant factory views, neighbours who liked to party (and park right outside my front door) and a cold, sterile bathroom. It was the worst six months of my life. While I was there (over Christmas too), my dad was rushed into hospital, my dog died, and a girl I really, really liked made it clear it wasn't ever going to be mutual.

I drank a lot while I was there. I developed a taste for red wine and vodka and cultivated my interest in whiskey and Jack. A trip to the supermarket wasn't complete without spending at least £15 on spirits. I stayed up late watching DVDs on a tiny TV (that I'd forgot to buy a TV license for), drinking till I was sleepy enough to make it through the night. The staircase was really steep; more than once I remember climbing up to the bedroom on my hands a knees.

I'm sure I listened to a lot of music while I lived in that house. I was working in the record library at the time so getting loads of freebie CDs and gig tickets. It was probably around the time Britpop started imploding, so my album of choice was more than likely This Is Hardcore, the perfect soundtrack to my life right at that moment (and, ironically, my favourite record of the 90s).

But it's not Pulp that reminds me of that house, and that dark, dark time. It's not Radiohead either, though they would be similarly appropriate. Actually, it's Sonny & Cher, I Got You Babe. My overriding memory is of watching Groundhog Day on DVD, struggling to laugh, hearing that song come round again and again and again...

A couple of mates rescued me a few months later, offering me a room in a shared house in a much more pleasant area, and happier times (while they lasted). I'll always be grateful to Matt and Greg (and Dave, who was moving out) for getting me out of that pit.

30 Songs - Day 5

Day 05 – A Song That Reminds You Of Someone



Strangers In The Night will always remind me of my dad. He seemed to be forever whistling or humming it while working in his shed when I was a kid. I haven't heard it on his lips in some time, but whenever I hear Frank, it reminds me of Dad.

My mum hates Frank Sinatra though!