Went into Cafe Nero today. Ordered my usual black coffee to take out.
"Would you like a biscotti to go with that, sir?"
"Tell you what, call it a fucking bisCUIT and I might."
As mentioned a couple of weeks back, I'm back on the drugs. Specifically caffeine. And for no other reason than because I didn't have enough room in my Top Ten TV Songs for Blur... here's my Coffee Countdown.
10. Johnny Ray - Coffee & Cigarettes
Poor old Johnny Ray
Sounded sad upon the radio
Moved a million hearts in mono...
If it's good enough for Kevin Rowland, it's good enough for me.
9. Otis Redding - Cigarettes & Coffee
Some of the greatest songs ever written take place in the wee small hours of the morning, yet typically they're written from the point of view of a lonely, down-at-heel loser who's only companion is a whiskey glass. Otis bucks that trend by writing a small hours love song. They're just sitting here talking over cigarettes and coffee - with Otis on the stereo.
8. Crash Test Dummies - Afternoons & Coffee Spoons
The song that proves Crash Test Dummies weren't just an annoying Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm One Hit Wonder.
7. All Saints - Black Coffee
All Saints, Rol?
Really?
I'm a big fan of the classic girl-groups - from the Supremes to the Shangri Las... and for a second - just one second - All Saints came closer than most to recapturing and updating that sound. Ultimately they failed, but give them some credit...
6. Richard Thompson - Java Jive
From Richard Thompson's epic trawl through 1000 Years Of Popular Song, here he takes on The Ink Spots' 1940 hit. You know the one.
"I love coffee, I love tea, I love the Java Jive and it loves me..."
5. James - Coffee & Toast
Recorded in the original sessions for the Pleased To Meet You Album, this was subsequently relegated to b-side status when Brian Eno stepped on board the good ship James as producer. A shame, because this would have been the best track on the album. Perhaps Tim Booth realised this - he quit the band for 7 seven years after its release.
4. Squeeze - Black Coffee In Bed
Featuring Paul Young and Elvis Costello on backing vocals, another of those songs that reminds you what a great lyricist Chris Difford is.
3. Blur - Coffee & TV
The song that broke Blur and persuaded Graham Coxon a solo career was beckoning? Could be.
2. Prince - Starfish & Coffee
Prince goes into Cafe Nero...
"Hello sir, can I take your order."
"Yes, I'd like Starfish and coffee, maple syrup and jam, butterscotch clouds, a tangerine and a side order of ham, please."
"Certainly sir. And would you like a Biscotti with that too?"
"Call it a fucking bisCUIT and I might."
Soulwax do a cracking cover of this song too.
1. The Clint Boon Experience - White No Sugar
The man on the mac in Macedonia
Hits on the girl with the fully loaded PC in DC
This is definitely a new revolution
Mr. Boon - play that tune!
So that was my caffeine fix - what's yours?
